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Govt to replace confusing ‘Amber Watchlist’ with much clearer ‘Tangeriney-Greeny Maybe List’

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Man who scoffs at people still wearing masks bit of a twat, study finds

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Fundamentalist vaccine refuser turned away from Pearly Gates for being an arse

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Anti-vaxxers immune to covid as they're not bright enough to qualify as human

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Sheep consider calling daftest members of their flock covid deniers

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Generous club bouncers quite willing to give two jabs on the door to any troublesome anti-vaxxers

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Britain nervously eyes up its fluffiest pets as toilet roll panic-buyers hit the supermarket shelves again

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'Vaccine passports for clubbers is discrimination against us really really stupid people,' claims anti-vaxxers

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‘Virus McVirusface’ leading Government poll to name England's next super-variant

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'I was taking part in a new pilot scheme' set to become nation's favourite excuse

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Tories say sugar and salt tax would harm freedom of choice, donations from big companies

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Public plead with Goldman Sachs not to make bankers wear masks - or do anything else to avoid covid

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'It couldn't have happened to a nicer man,' says world as Bolsonaro hospitalised for having continuous hiccups

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New rules say public transport firms must make own mask decisions, keep blame away from waffling buffoon in Number 10

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Home Secretary Priti Patel diagnosed with rare case of late onset anti-racism

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Hindenburg hailed as safe aircraft by Dido Harding

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